Tales of Captain Slappy Jr.
With a blatant nod to nepotism, I offer the improvised tales of my eldest son.
-----The Nonsense Report
Hi. My name is Billy and I'm going to tell you about my report. In 1706, when George Washington crossed the Pacific, he landed and discovered the automobile. He then drove to Texaco and got a hotdog. In 1709, he created the airplane, allowing him to fly into space. He landed on Jupiter and went to the local market to buy groceries. There, he bought an alien costume to deliver Christmas presents to all the children in his Ford. After he finished, he was greeted by his dog that he took back to his homeland, Asia. He then summoned a meteor to destroy the dinosaurs. He then grabbed his shotgun to shoot down the dragon that was terrorizing his community. Then he grabbed a jackhammer to break up the Super Continent, Pangea. He then built the Golden Gate Bridge and the Great Wall of China. Then he painted the Mona Lisa and stole it. That's my report. I hope you liked it.
Billy, age 26, 2005, Harvard University
